I'm reading Kate Chopin's The Awakening and it's making me feel sad. Sad, and kind of like I want to go live in New Orleans. But not in this century.
Everything's making me feel sad. (But not necessarily like living in New Orleans. Regardless of century.)
It's raining and gray and humid and smelly outside. If I haven't mentioned it before, let me do so now: Texas stinks.
I don't know why I feel so sad. I can't seem to absolutely define it.
I mean, there are a lot of things I could be feeling sad about... I just can't seem to actually pick one.
I dreamt the other night that somehow the kids and I had already obtained our quote/unquote dream house... and then somehow lost it. In the dream, other people were living in it, a couple and their children and we were standing outside, looking up at the house. I realized that they had all our things, that we had been forced to leave all our possessions behind and this other family now owned them. I turned to Sierra, I said, "CiCi? Do you remember which room was yours?" And she said, "I don't really remember, Mom. And now that other girl has my room."
And it was the saddest, most depressing dream, just standing outside, looking at our former house, knowing we'd lost it and would never have a home again. And I woke up so sad, and I haven't been able to shake this sadness, and I don't know what to do.
Eh.
Everything's making me feel sad. (But not necessarily like living in New Orleans. Regardless of century.)
It's raining and gray and humid and smelly outside. If I haven't mentioned it before, let me do so now: Texas stinks.
I don't know why I feel so sad. I can't seem to absolutely define it.
I mean, there are a lot of things I could be feeling sad about... I just can't seem to actually pick one.
I dreamt the other night that somehow the kids and I had already obtained our quote/unquote dream house... and then somehow lost it. In the dream, other people were living in it, a couple and their children and we were standing outside, looking up at the house. I realized that they had all our things, that we had been forced to leave all our possessions behind and this other family now owned them. I turned to Sierra, I said, "CiCi? Do you remember which room was yours?" And she said, "I don't really remember, Mom. And now that other girl has my room."
And it was the saddest, most depressing dream, just standing outside, looking at our former house, knowing we'd lost it and would never have a home again. And I woke up so sad, and I haven't been able to shake this sadness, and I don't know what to do.
Eh.
Leave a comment