My site is also the first one that comes up for "chihuahuas eating panties."
I just had to go check, since after "tentacle hentai" (here we go some more...), these are the searches that my sitemeter most shows as resulting in my site.
I'm, umm, sorry?
***
Update: OMG! I had to see how many other sites result from "chihuahuas eating panties" and I had NO IDEA that ALL CHIHUAHUAS apparently EAT PANTIES!!!
Who knew?
Shouldn't the AKC be, idk, MENTIONING this?
It's a flipping EPIDEMIC!
CHIHUAHUAS! EATING PANTIES! ALL ACROSS THE NATION!
Why hasn't this been on the NEWS??? (I'll tell you why: There has apparently been some big kind of sporting thing monopolizing the news on ALL the flipping channels! What's up with THAT???)
Christ! Listen to THIS:
"However, he really isn't chewing on stuff anymore, he is EATING my panties. He's eaten at least 10 pairs of Victoria's Secret panties, and a few socks. WHOLE!! Most of them are brand new, I have to keep buying more because he eats them all. He has chew toys, and I can't figure out how he's getting my underwear. I keep all the laundry out of reach, but somehow he gets them. When I say eating, I don't mean he's chewing on them, he swallows them whole. The final straw was him throwing up ANOTHER pair of BRAND NEW ones last night. My front lawn looks like a panty raid, from him passing them. I kicked him out of the house last night, and told Nate he has to get rid of the dog, I'm sick of it. Any suggestions?? I'm not sure any suggestions will really help at this point, but I' figured I'd give it a try. Also, since I won't let him back in the house, if we keep him, he'll be an outside dog. It gets pretty cold here later in the year, so how do I protect him from the cold? TIA!!" <http://www.momsview.com/discus/messages/41/28656.html>
Omg, that's funny!(And omg, so cruel to the little dog, locking him out in the freezing cold!) (Furthermore, omg! Why can't she just somehow KEEP HER PANTIES WHERE A TINY LITTLE DOG CAN'T GET TO THEM???) (Omg, I'm stuck in someone else's font again!)
And look! Oh lord, I can't even copy/paste it! It says "girl juice!" Squick! Look!
And this! This chihuahua has its own site! Listen: "My Hobbies are eating panties , chewing on tissues & and long walks on the beach."
Unbelievable! C'est incroyible!* Panty chewing is endemic to chihuahuas! It's true! The Internet told me so!
(Umm... So yeah; I got too much time on my hands...)
* Can you believe it??? Get to your Google search, type in "C'est incroyible!" and I'm the NUMBER ONE SITE!!! And I don't even know if I'm SPELLING IT RIGHT!!!
Yeah, but did you happen to notice that the FIRST (YouTube) result was a (really poor-quality) video of two gay crackheads dancing at Baltimore's Inner Harbor???
Now really, Texas doesn't seem so bad, does it?
(Heh. I really oughta go down there more. It's only a few blocks away. Why should the tourists get to have all the fun?)
Actually, I'm thinking Texas would only be improved by Gay Crackhead Dancing.
And ah-hah! Baltimore, with an Inner Harbor, apparently DOES have an ocean!
Well… it has a harbor, which leads to the Chesapeake Bay, which leads to the Atlantic.
So, yeah, sort of. I guess. Why? Did I miss something?
No, wait. I forgot.
Texas really IS that bad. No, really.
I was stationed at Goodfellow AFB for a short time back in the 80s, when I was proudly serving in our country's armed forces.
I'd forgotten almost forgotten about that part. I was on the phone tonight with an old army buddy who was there with me, and we reminded each other about the many miserable, degrading, or just plain unsanitary experiences we'd endured in the greater San Angelo metropolitan area... bleccch. What a shit-hole.
Buncha inbred knuckle-draggers wandering slack-jawed through acres of rusting oil equipment. I remember the bumper stickers: “Please God, send us another oil boom. We promise not to piss this one away.”
So you go ahead and make fun of Texas, honey. It's okay.
You better smile when you call me "honey," son.