It's funny, I'm suddenly seeing a resurgence it hits in my logs, on "survivor am naked", which I think we can all agree is a worthy sight.

Now, these never really went away; they'd turn up monthly or so, proving that america loves a naked,fake-breasted lesbian, no matter how long she's been gone from reality teevee. But when it was announced that she'd be in the currently-running Survivor: Fans vs Faves, the hit count went up, and is still going up.

Which is ok by me, even though I never actually posted the above-mentioned titty shots of Miss Survivor Ami.

But this brings us to the topic of Search Word Poetry (or as originally coined, Googl-oetry, though I don't like that term, being that it can be from any search engine, not only google).

The idea's simple; dig out the search-strings that brought readers to your blog from whatever logs and meters you may choose (urchin, sitemeter, whatever).

Use those phrases to create your own poetry.

Vis:

tell me more about the devil, who is he? catholic ron paul? polish guy and catholic in a boat joke? phone numbers to recorded preachers? bitch phone number? pastor melissa scott sex life?

     --Exterminator

Aphrodite’s Greatest Failure:
How sexuality is viewed across religions,
Catholic churches view on premarital
Religions who allow sexuality.
Most men are by nature perverted -
The result of secret sin.
     --the chaplain

weird photos of naked girls
let's see some women with nice asses that like sex
girls fuck with fruits
     --greta christina

gay crack head
morphine
subbing for algebra with kids that won't be quiet
i hate texas
     --circe

Now, I wish to hell I was more a poet and could do what these lovely citizens have done. Because god knows I get some good search terms:

tentacle rape
soccerboy rape
butch daddy erotica
daddy fuck me harder
my neighbor sucked my balls her mouth
girls doing a snowball blowjob
best busty chocolate blow jobs
extrem big woman trampling
shoes kiss trample video
awk machine gun
how to roast a pig cinder block
chicken and pig, breakfast
roasting pig in virginia
i have a crush on adam duritz
question cross ring womens indian larry
perfect, lamar thought. just incest and old men with young girls fucking porn perfect
ass fucken sex
fuck me hard art
squid fuck
fucking tarzan
air stewardess fucked
spicy labia fucking images
tuna skroodle
sex skunked
naked taiko drummers
local loop call bugging beeping noise
virgin digital exercise your music muscle
titanic engine size
licked the scotch off her tits
she moaned car tits thrust show
jessi combs belly tattoo
jessi combs thong picture
pussy tattoos
moomin tattoo
what movies do maggie gyllenhaal get naked in
bars over eyes
starch and iodine leaks threw the bag results
my hand slid under her dress
hand in her panties
drenched panties
silky panties photos women pubic hairs
picked up her panties and stuffed them in her mouth as a gag

But you know, I just can't seem to make it all turn into poetry.

So two things:

1) go do your own and post it
2) if you get inspired by any of the above, post your result in my comments

Because someone has to make art out of all this, even if it isn't me.

Ok, so I need some help from a template designer who knows movable type 4. I don't need a lot, but I do need someone else to suffer the slings and arrows for me. Payment will be in sexual favors and good old yankee dollars. I don't intend to port my old template as is, but I want to keep some of it's elements, so I've got a pretty clear idea of a starting point.

I know. I know. It's scary in here. Different. It's ok. Really. It's the same old moronosphere with a new skin. Change is good, they say, and if it isn't, change is still change. The real story is that I've just upgraded to Movable Type 4.1, and because the folks at six-apart feel the need to change things completely, whle feeling no need at all to maintain backwards compatability, everything in my blog design had to be abandoned in order to convert. It took me a really long time to feel ok with that. But I think I'm there. And I gotta say, this took a hell of a lot less time than trying to convert everything, even if the result is somewhat grim. I=n fact I managed to do this in between tasks today while waiting for builds to finish Don't worry, my logo, at least, will come back. I'm attached to it. I just have to figure out how these fucking widgets work.

You may have noticed we're having some server instability around here; comments disabled for various moronosphere-hosted blogs, server not responding, etc.

For those of you I host, you'll have seen it as well when you try to post.

We're working on it. We have several small problems that are adding up to a systemic pain-in-the-ass, and solving these issues has more to do with bandwidth (ours, ie, time to work on it) than with any seriousness of the problems.

Fixes should be in place soon, though we may have some downtime somewhere in the next week or two while we update things. I'll post warnings before that happens.

I became aware of this because a commenter on my previous entry mentioned it. This tells you how on-the-fucking-ball I am lately, when readers have to mention significant dates to me. I mean come ON, I'm mister significant dates.

Today marks four years of blogging; four years of the pain and pleasure that is The Moronosphere.

But as with the new year, it's seemed that I don't have much to say about milestones lately. Maybe, to steal a quote from Iandiana Jones, It's not the years, honey, it's the mileage. Maybe I've just had too many milestones and they're getting smaller with perspective.

Or maybe it's a symptom of everything else lately, the motivational drain of too much have to and not enough want to. I can't seem to get worked up much lately unless there's sex involved, and I can't seem to get the sexuality lined up with the creativity to turn that into something that lasts longer than few orgasms.

Who th' fuck knows, y'know?

Four years blogging. I'm not even sure what to say of it. I was surprised to be still at it after one, amazed after two, and still thrilled with what this whole experience has given me in terms of friends made and experiences had, not to mention with the pleasure of simply having an audience for my words. At three, I had les to say, simply observing that it'd been a Long, Strange Trip.

At four I find still less to say on the matter; but maybe that's because in the last year, my written output has radically decreased from the previous year.

I find myself compelled to graph this:

And yes, I spenty 20 minutes goofing with excel for that, as a way of avoiding writing more words (you know the ratio of worth, pictures to words, after all).

Yet, what I see when I graph this isn't that my output has dropped near zero, as I expected. It was dropped to near 2004, but that is certainly not zero. This in some way gives me hope; it tells me I'm not done with this. I considered graphing by months, but that I fear would show me an unfavorable curve, and I think I won't look at that, at least not today.

What I will do, though, is set myself a challenge; I *must* write something fictional before January is gone, even if it's only a scene or a bit of dialog. I do not need to *finish* it, but I need to publish it here, just to prove to myself I haven't lost the gift of it, and I guess to say fuck you you fucking fuck to my recalcitrant muse. I've tended to use distractions and workload and issues with attention span to justify not writing; I must stop that. I must write, even if it's only a few words. After all, so the anecdote has it, James Joyce once sat disconsolate in his study when a friend dropped by. "I've only written seven words today", Joyce told him. "But James", reassured his friend, "Seven words is a good day for you". "Yes," wailed Joyce, "But I don't know which order they go in".

If seven words were good for James Joyce, I should count it a success if I can make a baker's dozen.

(thanks to Taro's Travels for that quote, I couldn't quote recall it)

This is Moronosphere blog entry number 1000. And I look at that number with a mixture of confusion and pride.

In January of 2004, my friend Jennifer offered to host of a domain I owned. I wasn't doing anything with it, but I figured, hell, I might as well host it someplace and use it for email and a couple of web pages. Jen's then-boyfriend had a machine in his office, and was more than happy to donate a bit of space and a bit of bandwidth.

Do you want a blog, while I'm at it? Jen asked me, since she already had Movable Type installed.

I couldn't really imagine why I'd want one, but I was curious about how the tools worked. I didn't really get blogging, but I learn better with my hands involved than when it's just my eyes. So I said, yeah why not.

I didn't think much about it. I'd been hanging around with a few bloggers like Trance, Circe, Doxy, Jenifer, and a number of others, and I didn't really see myself doing what they did. On the other hand, I'd been having a successful run writing erotic fiction, which was posted on a now-defunct site called Satin Slippers. So I figured, blogging might help my writing; it might give me a place to get down my own thoughts on writing, and would be a place to keep in practice when the muse wasn't cooperating.

Plans like that rarely quite play out when it comes to blogs. One may begin writing about sex, to find one's voice is more focused on personal growth. One may start writing about chickens, and then find one's blogger's voice has more to do with family and daily life. Blogging's like that. Once you stop thinking about what you write, and begin to write, the blog has a personality all it's own. This sort of writing has no rules.

I started doing this, one thosand entries ago, with no thought to who might ever read it, what it might bring or cost, or what it's duration. I am, frankly, amazed to find I'm still doing it. I cannot stop, even if I want, though some days it seems a burden, or an herculean labor.

I find the outlet - and the audience - the be an essential part of my life, as much when I can't do it as when I can.

Still - one thousand. I wish there was a good way to count the words; half a million? a million? More?

There's a small temptation to summarize the fractional lifetime these 1000 pages represent; but I've done that in one sense far too much already. And the years between then and now haven't lain easily on me, for all that there are high points ranking in the highest of my life. Summaries will be left for another time, some more concrete life milestone.

This project started out just for me, and always, I need to focus on that. It's not for you people, for all I love the lot of you; it's for me, and I have to keep writing for myself, and not censor so much as I sometimes have. Whatever I'm feeling, I need to try harder to write it, and let the desire to be good hinder me less. I need to think less about who may or may not think is that about me, and write, to the best of my ability, as if no one was reading.

One thousand entries. A line from a Gin Blossoms song comes to mind:

The lost horizons I could see
are now resigned to memories
I never thought I'd still be here today

I still can't really say I get blogging, of course, but maybe in another thousand entries, I will.

I'm fiddling about with my blog template, seeing if I can get a new feel without too much effort. I liked that drop-in I had last week but I *hate* fixed column widths; fixing that one was more effort since I actually *know* this template.

So there you have it.

If something's fucked up, ignore it, this is real-time engineering.

Something was broken in my template (I must have made some minor tweak I don't recall), so I decided to temporarily dump the purple-n-piracy.

I really need a new layout but given my lack of time to write I can't quite see finding time to work on templates.

Someday. Maybe.

Anyway, if anything looks completely fucked up around here (aside from yours truly), I'll fix it as soon as I'm able.

...With thanks to Len Peralta of monsterbymail.com

For reasons unknown, out webserver was down last night and this morning.

Sorry about that, folks. I'll try to identify why.

I'm havin' a shitload a problems with persistent, cached routes, PLUS I accidently published one of my other blogs over this site (pilot error - bad cut-n-paste (which I just typo'd cunt-n-paste as usual).

If yer havin' a less than stellar experience here, well, I guess it's that. Or just the usual less-than-stellar experience, but for that I can't blame the stupid internet.

Its one of those funny things when you get a new one and it's just like the old one. Like those weird people who get a new car and get the exact same car they had before (yeah I'm talking to you, Lisa).

If you're readin' this it means you're now on a shiny, fast and new server. Basically, if you see a difference, it means I broke something.

Due to an unexpected schedule change, The Moronosphere and all it's related blogs and domains will be moving to a new physical server this week. Not the best timing for me, personally but I live here by the good grace and generosity of my friend Brandon, and so I am grateful even if a bit frazzled.

What all this means is that this site may unexpectedly vanish for a day or so while we change ip addresses; comments may cease to work while databases are moved.

If that happens, don't worry; being a fly-by-night sort of operation, we're flying-by-night (oh god stop me from quoting a rush song). Things should stabilize by next week, on bigger, better, faster hardware.

EDIT: The error below was my fault, i fucked up the install. On a second try I got it right.

They've fixed quite a few bugs, which is good, though the interface problem remains un-addressed. So it is progress, if not in the interface.

Six-Apart have released a new beta (beta 2) - which doesn't work at all, won't even load (click the image below to see a beautiful error message):

They did admit there are some issues with the completely bolloxed up interface; they 'solved' this by combing two obscure pulldowns into one obscure pulldown, while not seeming to see the core problem of hiding all the frequent tasks behind pulldowns and page loads.

[sarcasm] and there was much rejoicing[/sarcasm]

They really don't get it; but at least i finally got noticed and responded to by the people at Six Apart. They're not stupid, so the question is only, will they get what they did wrong or will they keep trying to band-aid a death-wound. It's about a coin-flip on that one right now.

comment spammers have brought my (brandon's) server to it's knees. If you can't comment that's why. Sorry about that folks; we're working on it.

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I dunno if we finally did the right thing or if the spammers just gave up and ran, but this finally calmed down.

I do NOT get what they think they're achiving. We all have nofollows on our links and most of us restrict who can post, so they're spending cycles attacking the world, spending effort (and often using illegal resources).

And for what? To annoy us so mch we eventually find a way to cut them off. Unless they're in the business of selling more security software and hardware, they're not getting dick from this.

So it's hard not to see it as malice, you know? Malice or stupidity. I'll admit stupidity is the easy answer, but malice is just somehow more satisfying.

This caps a day where I struggled all morning to over-come a hangover and to write; the hangover I beat, the writing though, I never did, instead spending my day moderating domestic mayhem and cooking all afternoon. I shopped, did laundry, and while ideas floated through the back of my skull, they never stuck long enough to get down on paper or keyboard.

At least my kitchen smells of fresh turkey stock, which tomorrow should become asparagus soup, or possible tortilla soup; and I finished the day with little tequila while Papa Christo played guitar in my living room.

Days that end peafully are a good thing. I need them on almost all days ending in 'y'.

Well, I'm suddenly up on 25peeps.

No, not those peeps, 25peeps.

I have no idea why. But go 'head and click me, early and often.

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EDIT:

Well, 25peeps, which started out as a great idea (put up your face and see who clicks you and goes to your blog) has already degenerated into a farm for T&A and splogs. That didn't take long. Pretty much any pic that ain't T&A gets pushed off right quick.

...maybe if I posted an up-kilt shot?

Anyway, I thought about re-upping but fuck 'em.

I feel like all I've been writing about lately are objects of lust - material objects, not the lickable, suckable kind (nevermind that someone wanted to lick my new washer).

Which makes this all seem one-dimensonal. Karl has a new object of material desire is all this blog seems to be about.

I'm a big fan of lust. I think it's just about the best thing in the human condition. There is nothing quite so glorious as working lust up to the point where one's READY - TO - EXPLODE; and then getting the object of said lust right at that frantic, frenzied peak.

But when that thing is, well, a thing, of silver or iron or shiny-bright plastic, no matter the lust, no matter the usefulness of the object, it is, still, only an object and only as good as it is useful

The funny thing is, though I so often blog about things I like or want, I'm not all that materially driven. Most of what I care about, of the many things I own, are the ones that solve a problem in some particularly good way. My coffee maker which looks cool in shiny stainless, but more importantly makes a damned fine cup of java to get my brain working in the morning. My knives, bright steel or dull carbon, chef's knives, pocket knives, switchblades and tactical folders, all of which do a job for me on a daily basis.

My Jeep and my motorcycle please me for aesthetic reasons, but more importantly, they move me from here to there in ways quick and efficient; I can go over almost anything and park almost anywhere in my jeep, I can slice through traffic and park where I will on my Triumph. They have limitations and impracticalities, but they do exactly what I want them for.

I love that they please my eye; I keep them because they do the job well.

I own fine audiophile components, home entertainment centers, video game consoles. I like these things, and I use them, but in the end it's the art and the play that matter, the music, the movies, the games, not the things. They solve a problem.

I struggle between the lustful desire for pretty things and the desire to keep my life simple, clean, easy, functional.

One of my dreams is to live somewhere to basic, so physically simple, that everything goes and I'm down to what I absolutely need. The gypsy life with no roots, no more belongings that I can fit in a wagon, a van, or best of all, a boat. The nautical existence draws me and I struggle with the idea; give it all up, strip my life down and go, vs the comfort and plenty of my daily life. Because that comfort and plenty is a cage of sorts; I am a keeper for the things I own and the space they take up. A slave to the material goods that make up my life.

One of the things I struggle with is art. I long to collect, to own; I want beautiful things, from jewelry to sculpture to hand-made clothing like my best Aloha shirts. From original paintings to framed prints to odd posters collected over my lifetime. I love these things, yet so often, owning art seems somehow wrong. And it traps me again, for I must provide space and shelter and protection for the fragile, beautiful things I own.

My other lusts are simpler. For those lusts are pure, focused desire, for things that are not things; living, moving, thinking, speaking, lust is for the entire organism, not simply as an object but as a complete person.

Lust isn't free of complications. No, it's got outrageous complications of it's own. But it's not the same. For when I choose to take on a role of owner, keeper it's not the trap of ownership of a thing, it's a choice shared, and a reciprocal role.

Those, in truth, are the lusts I'd rather be writing about; fictional and real, fulfilled and unfulfilled. I'd rather spend my energy describing my heart's dearest and most salacious desire. Though for some reason, that sort of writing flows only occasionally, where the lust itself is never-ending. That writing requires a special touch from the muse.

However, the muse who inspires material lust seems always nearbye, and so I write as I am able, and talk about shiny rings, bright red washers and fast cars rather than sweat-glstening skin and the musky smell of love; I describe my desire for a garment or a vehicle rather than the wrenching physical need a simple touch can bring, when said touch is from the right person.

Though who knows; tomorrow that muse may come back to visit and I may find it easier to write about stolen moments of embrace and finger-bruised skin, about the familiar scent of desire and the need one can feel like a white-hot knife in the belly.

Maybe.

I just noticed that my third blogiversary is coming up; middle of this month.

Jan 15, 2004, as a lark, I posted my first blog entry. My friend Jen had offered me hosting space for a domain I owned; I just wanted a place to park the name, and maybe a few pages of storage.

Want a blog, while we're at it? she asked me. And I figured, hell why not, though I've nothing to say and no one's gonna read it.

So, on a sunny california mid-january day in '04, I sat down and asked that question that almost every new blogger asks - why am i doing this?

Three years later, and I still don't know the answer to that. But I do know that I was wrong, and people are, for some unknown reason, reading.

The phrase Long, Strange Trip comes to mind.

Thus, on Jan 15th, I'll celebrate three years. And I expect you all to celebrate with me, taking a sip or a hit or a snort or a swallow of your favorite poison, and touching yourself or someone else (or, you know, me, if you can reach that far) in the most indecent way possible. Show me some dirty love, people.

I've had a couple users report trouble with the comments on my blog - seems like they're running afoul of some of my anti-spam measures.

If you're having trouble posting a comment, let me know.

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Edit - I switched off one of the more agressive anti-spam agents, so anyone who was foiled by this (it would have told you somethning like 'you've commented too recently'), try again and let me know. It seemed to be working sometimes.

God DAMN comment spammers for making this necessary.

I spend far too much time looking at web stats.

I know who hits from where, when - for most of my regular readers, anyway. I know who's in NYC and who's in DC; who's in NO and who's in what part of TX; I know who's on the peninsula and who's in KC and who's in AZ; I know who's in belgium, who's in the UK and who's in the Great White North.

There are a few that puzzle me though.

For example - who's that in Beverly Hills? I've seen you here a few times.

Who's the reader in San Jose, CA, who was reading my decmeber archives for almost an hour today?

Who's the one on Irvine who spent three hours on my writing blog?

Who are the people who visit from strange places and never say a word? A blogger has to wonder. When readers slip in and out almost silently, leaving only a hit counter's trace behind, who are they?

My other blog - the one where I post my fiction and other non-blog writing - has had the comments broken for a while now. I just noticed this. It's now fixed.

I've you've tried to comment, sorry. If you have not, please do. Feedback is what keep me working.

I you haven't had a chance to read some of my fiction, etc, I have it all linked in the 'Writing' section on my right side-bar. Feel free to dip in and enjoy, but please comment, even if you hate the work (there are a couple of weak pieces there, but you know, it can't all be a home run).

I'm thinking of doing a major blog re-design.

I'm aces at the movable type template/plugins etc, but i sort of suck ass at graphic design (when I say suck ass, I mean in a bad way). So i need someone who can work with me on this who sorta gets movable type templates and who gets my aesthetic.

Anyone interested?

What I got in mind is something akin to this; with a color palate and design based on classic old school tattoo flash. I want to keep something similar to the general layout i have now (i have too damned many links to do two columns), but with a re-vamped (and maybe easier-on-the-eyes) color scheme. I actually have a shirt that looks really similar to the color/design feel i want (click for a full-size view):

If you're interested in helpin' me out, let me know.

our database server went down sunday afternoon for yet-unknown reasons, which accounts for why all m'sphere blogs were un-commentable for a bit. All fixed now (thanks Brandon).

So you may have noticed the new banner - thanks to Brandon who makes all this possible here at the 'sphere. He just whipped this out for me (tee-hee) for his own entertainment. It won't stay long so here's a sample for later when I've changed again.

But an interesting question was raised. What's FTW (Which you may not be able to see on a small or low-res monitor, but it's on the fingers) mean?

I always thought it was obvious. It is, was, and always will be Fuck The World; known to bikers and punks everywhere, though the meaning of THAT could be debated. To me it means, fuck what everyone thinks, I'm doing it my way. It could just as well mean truly, fuck all of you people, nothing matters but me, or some variation. Personally i prefer the other meaning, and when I wear something with that on it, that's how I take it.

But another meaning was pointed out to me that I'd never heard. And I don't mean For The Win which is l33t-speak gamer nonsense, or Flip The Walrus which is pretty damned funny even though I think it was made up in a sort of discordian gesture; nor do I mean the silly "it means What The Fuck, only with extra confusion". Because all that's akin to changing Shit Happens to Good Happens, trying to nice up something without actually understanding it.

No, T'm talking about a racist meaning. And I'm not even going to type out what that is, so as not to get picked up on google searches for it. I'm not going to type the names of the assholes who might use such a phrase. But what I'm wondering is, who's actually ever even heard such a usage? I sure as hell hadn't, and had to go looking for it and wade through lots and lots and lots of pages saying For The Win before I could find a page that contained the racially-tinged meaning.

Not that I'd surrender the usage because some stupid bastards take it up; i mean, hell, there goes my scottish heritage and shaved head if i want to abandon something just cause those asswipes decide it's an icon of pure whiteness. But i figured, a guy should know these things....

Y'know, I'm just sayin...

I was trying to temporarily replace my current blog layout with something halloweeny (weenish? something like that), you know, black and orange with silly-scary lettering.

I figured, you're home sick on halloween rather than out putting the trick in trick or treat, you might as well at least tart up your blog in halloween finery (cheapery?).

But i ran into some trivial technical problem and with grouchy-sick-guy patience, i said fuck this and gave up. What's the point in decorating when you're not even blogging, sez I.

Still. I think i need to change the look of this place. Out with teh piracy, in with the tattoo flash, or something.

Well, the whole Moronosphere and everything it contains went down like a cheap hooker last night. This wasn't unplanned, but we'd rather expected a short and simple downtime. Best Laid Plans, wee, sleekit, cow'rin, tim'rous beastie.

Due to some bad luck and just-ok support from the people who provide us physical hosting, getting the new-and-improved system back on line took very much longer than expected, and now, we're finding all the things we need to hand-fix as we rebuild.

All is well. Remain Calm.

The Host with the Most, Brandon has slept maybe an hour in the last two days while he works on this, and we all owe him a case of red-bull and maybe something stronger later on. Thanks brutha man. You rule.

Things might be glitchy in the m'sphereian blogs listed in my side bar for another couple days. Patience, jackass, patience.

We're in the middle of some server OS upgrades (new linux version, new versions of some of our management tools) so if anything seems funky, bear with us, we'll iron it out over the next day or two.

Once again, a bazillion thanks to Brandon at Athena Internet for puttin' up with us. Brandon, yer a hero. I owe you.

The most excellent Gavin of Kode Koan just got me an incredibly simple one-liner fix for MTLJPost, an MT plugin that cross-posts MT to LiveJournal (MT 3.x broke it.)

If you read me there, you can see it works again!

This fix is cake - in your MT install, edit this file:

      [MT Root]/plugins/MTLJPost/MTLJPost.pl

Change this line:

      $t->param('TRACKBACKCOUNT', $entry->trackback_count);
to
      $t->param('TRACKBACKCOUNT', $entry->ping_count);

And that's it. It should start working.

Thanks, Gavin!

A few minutes ago MacDude im'd me to point out that there was a minor problem with my blog (Now fixed) that made the center column vanish for a while.

"I think your blog is messed up," he said. "no content."

"How's that different from usual?" I answered.

You may notice some adverts here and there around the m'sphere.

Which ain't exactly piracy, but you know, you do what 'ya gotta.

I'm tryin' this out after helping a hot and lovely friend research ads. They may not stay, we'll see what i get in the way of filthy lucre.

The Motörhead logo is back.

I am the one, Orgasmatron, the outstretched grasping hand
My image is of agony, my servants rape the land
Obsequious and arrogant, clandestine and vain
Two thousand years of misery, of torture in my name
Hypocrisy made paramount, paranoia the law
My name is called religion, sadistic, sacred whore.

I twist the truth, I rule the world, my crown is called deceit
I am the emperor of lies, you grovel at my feet
I rob you and I slaughter you, your downfall is my gain
And still you play the sycophant and revel in you pain
And all my promises are lies, all my love is hate
I am the politician, and I decide your fate

I march before a martyred world, an army for the fight
I speak of great heroic days, of victory and might
I hold a banner drenched in blood, I urge you to be brave
I lead you to your destiny, I lead you to your grave
Your bones will build my palaces, your eyes will stud my crown
For I am Mars, the god of war, and I will cut you down.

Because I löve you all. Vïcïôüslÿ.

I found this font I couldn't resist. So we're temporarily the, you know, kool-aid-o-sphere.

Thanks to the lovely-and-talented Miss Syl, font geek and photoshop bitch extraordinaire.

We're up and running on the final MT 3.3 release candidate. Fingers crossed, we may have a full release on it by the end of the week.

Update - The MT 3.3 Beta has been released.

I encourage MT users to get on board and help test - I'd like to see this release go GA shortly, it's got some REALLY cool features. I'm not planning to upgrade this-here space yet (not 'til they get to at least beta version 2 or 3), but it's looking pretty solid in my beta-testing blog and I've seen no major bugs yet.

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SixApart are about to start a beta test of Movable Type 3.3.

The plan as of now is to install that here - maybe not the day it comes out, but shortly after. I'll likely (If I have time) install 3.3 as a separate installation first to drive it around and see what's different. If any of you-all who have m'sphere blogs are interested, I'll point you to it.

I have not seen a change list to see what they've added, but I'm hoping it's 1) good stuff and 2) doesn't break anything.

While I think MT is the best bloging platform out there, I'm not sure how confident I am in SixApart these days; they seem like they're letting things get away from them on TypePad and of course they're spending cycles supporting LiveJournal, which is possibly the worst blogging platform around, if the one with the largest customer base. I'm hoping they get control of that shortly.

I didn't really plan it but I seem to have taken some sort of break from blogging. I look back at my last couple weeks of entries and find that even though there are a few posts, they're free of content. And since last weekend I've had nothing whatsoever to say, not even able to write apart from a couple current-eventss notes.

I don't know if this is the end of taking a break or just the beginning. But I know I still have nothing to say.

So. Let's just call this a blog break and see what happens.

Cats foot iron claw
Neuro-surgeons scream for more
At paranoias poison door.
Twenty first century schizoid man.

Blood rack barbed wire
Polititians funeral pyre
Innocents raped with napalm fire
Twenty first century schizoid man.

Death seed blind mans greed
Poets starving children bleed
Nothing hes got he really needs
Twenty first century schizoid man.

Suddenly I'm getting dozens of hits from people googling skunked sex.

I don't even know what that means. But somehow I'm getting hits.

(scratches head. shrugs.)

I like it better when I get hits on daddy fuck me really hard, but I'll take what I can get.

I think I've mostly un-done the template breakage, but I still need to tweak a few things.

Right now I'm hip deep in Joomla, trying to figure out how to shoehorn a internal group website into a Joomla layout. Sections and Categories and Bears, Oh My. I'm finally putting the blog-related skills into something now work-related.

Psst! Avast there! It be too late to alter course, mateys. And there be plundering pirates lurkin' in ev'ry cove, waitin' to board. Sit closer together and keep your ruddy hands in board. That be the best way to repel boarders. And mark well me words, mateys: Dead men tell no tales!

Evidently some trackback-spamming bastards attacked us (and by us I mean my tribe, those hosted here at the m'sphere). My good buddy, Brandon, the host-with-the-most, did battle against the forces of darkness through the night and finally disabled trackbacks for our site (who needs fuckin' trackbacks anyway, sez I).

The result of all this is that last night and this morning, all of the sites I host were inaccessible for some time. We're back on line now, thanks to Brandon's efforts.

And there was much rejoicing.

I just found a trick at LMT to make author comments show up differently than comments from the peanut gallery.

I tried this out yesterday in Hiromi's blog (which worked out pretty well) so today I added it to my blog.

Still tuning but I think it's pretty cool, it make it clear which comments are author replies; not that useful here but really useful for Hiromi, who is the queen of comments. I'm still tweaking around with her comments over there to get the best display but I'm likin' the way it works out.

(This is what I do when I'm sick - that cold I was fighting all last week finally won, and I feel like crap. Which I just typo'd as 'feel like carp', which may be how I feel, like a fuckin' carp.)

While we're on south park, there's a newer character generator I hadn't seen.

So, you know, south park elvis.

You never really know who's reading your blog, now, do you?

As you may have noticed, I'm foolin' with my banner. Brandon, who is the man, found my motorhead font so I made a new clix banner and then started playing with my header banner.

I'm not done with that but if it looks goofy, that's why. My photoshop skills are improving but I still suck at it.

The font is here if anyone wants it.

Well now. I've been upgraded - or downgraded - or degraded. Or just, you know, graded. Feels like that, or maybe that's more grated, and it feels like that as well.

Secure Computing, the motherfuckers who sell STOOPIDfilter to repressive countries and companies, agreed that I wasn't Pornography, sex.

Evidently I'm Personal Pages, Profanity, with a side of Personal, Mature.

Well, fuck yeah. That's me. The Moronosphere, ProfanityBlog.

Because we're all about the effword here.

Maybe it's mature that bothers me more. Who you callin' fuckin' mature? We ain't got no fuckin' maturity here. Not a sausage. Not a drop. Not a fuckin' cc, baby.

I guess the point is that the people at Secure Computing listen if we complain, but they still do the wrong thing and slap a fucking label on something they don't get.

I'll have to see if we're still banned in the fuckin' UAE. They're not allowed pornography, let's see if they're allowed to read the effword.

I finally figured out why some of my friends can't get to my site from their places of employment, and why my friend Arvind, the brilliant young developer of MtBlogRoll, can't get to my site at all from the United Arab Emirates.

Moronosphere.com is on the SmartFilter blacklist. I'm listed as a "Pornography" site and a "Sex" site; which mea