Author: elvis

Rockstar – thy name is mediocrity

elvis7 Comments

I’ve said before – i loved rockstar: inxs. But so far, I’m not loving rockstar: prefabSuperGroup. I loved rs:insx because – well, because of the guys in inxs. Gary Beers, the various and sundry Farriss brothers, the odd but talented Kirk Pengilly. This was a big deal to them, finding a singer. And not just […]

I’ve said before – i loved rockstar: inxs.

But so far, I’m not loving rockstar: prefabSuperGroup.

I loved rs:insx because – well, because of the guys in inxs. Gary Beers, the various and sundry Farriss brothers, the odd but talented Kirk Pengilly. This was a big deal to them, finding a singer. And not just a singer, a singer who had to fill some big fucking shoes without replacing the original guy.

That produced a sense of drama. There was a sad story beneath it all.

And then there were the singers; right from the start there was a deep pool of talent. JD, Mig, Marty, Sweet Susie McNeil; Jordis and Ty and Deanna. Ok, sure, there were some who were over thier heads, but there was a lot of talent, I mean al lot. Any of those people could have won, if not this, than something.

And I look at this installment, and see… Nothing.

Now, we have to take away the band factor. It makes a difference, but you can’t make another rs:inxs. But it’s the talent that troubles me. There’s one person who’s wowed me, Dilana Robichaux. She’s awesome. And after her there’s – a pool of mediocrity. Jill Gioia’s adorable, but average, Storm Large looked great in week one but ordinary in week two. Patrice Pike was boring the first go-round, though much better in week two. Lukas Rossi, who needs to lay off the foundation, has real talent and might be a dark horse.

The rest – range from forgetably mediocre to absolutely awful. I’m wondering how most of these people even got to the final, when some of ’em can’t seem to even carry a tune.

I’m wondering why the talent pool for this edition is smaller. That’s not how this should work.

I imagine I’ll keep watching. The house band simply smokes, i like Dave Navarro (though he’s getting a little too adorable for his own good), and the less Brooke Burke wears, the better I like her. And I want to hear Dilana sing more.

But it ain’t what I hoped. Where’s the fuckin’ talent, people?

t-t-t-twenty questions

elvis5 Comments

Swiped from Damn Jezebel 1. If you could be doing what you really want to be doing for a living, what would it be? Piracy on the high seas. Or at least being a dive master in some beautiful place. 2. If you could slap the shit out of any famous person, alive or dead, […]

Swiped from Damn Jezebel

1. If you could be doing what you really want to be doing for a living, what would it be?

Piracy on the high seas. Or at least being a dive master in some beautiful place.

2. If you could slap the shit out of any famous person, alive or dead, who would it be?

Disney management. Steven Speilberg. Network programmers. Stupid people who are in power.

3. What’s the dumbest decision you’ve made in the past 5 years?

Christ. One? There’ve been so many.

4. Give up one for a year: (good) sex or (good) music.

Music. That answer comes easily, yet I second guess it.

5. Dudes, would you rather have a big dick or a great sense of humor?

You mean I have to give up one?

6. So you’ve been invited to an all expense paid Blogger Prom in The Bahamas. You’re sitting at the bar on the beach. Which blogger do you want to join you for hours of good convo?

Um. Hell. Just for talk? I’m thinking Ray then. Because we all know he’s all talk.

7. Which blogger would you most like to cuddle with on the beach? (and don’t defer to your current signif other either. Infidelity won’t count against you. Duh.)

No matter how I answer this, someone’s getting hurt feelings.

8. You’re going on a 5 hour road trip: which 5 CDs do you bring?

Miles – Kind of Blue. King Crimson – one of the collections, I don’t know which one. Genesis – Lamb Lies Down on Broadway. Matthew Sweet – Altered Beast. XTC – Black Sea or English Settlement. Right this second. Tomorrow you’d get a different list.

9. Would you rather bury your children young or have your children bury you young?

I don’t wan to bury them, they’ll just keep squirming back out.

10. What’s your biggest insecurity?

Admitting my insecurities.

11.What’s the first blog you read every day, or however often you read them?

Re-Imagineering.

12. When’s the last time you peed your pants?

Pants?

13. Which was better, your first kiss or your first pay check?

My first paycheck. Though I’ve had some kisses since that beat any paycheck.

14. Do you have kids? Want kids?

Yes, and no. You can have them.

15. You get dropped off at home after the office holiday party by your bitch azz boss that you can’t effing stand… you exit the car and he peels out, runs a red light at your corner and rolls up an unsuspecting midget. The next day the midget watch groups are on TV outraged at the heartless hit and run, and are calling for any witnesses to please come fwd: that half dead midget has a family at home waiting on C-mas presents. Would you take $1000 hush money? $500? $100? A six pack?

No, but Bridget the Midget could give me something to keep me quiet.

16. Live the rest of your life without your eyebrows or your fingernails?

Who needs eyebrows?

17. What makes you angry?

Lies. Stupidity. Willfull ignorance.

18. What makes you horny?

All y’all.

19. What makes you nervous?

Having you read over my shoulder. GET THE FUCK AWAY.

20. What makes you smile?

A friendly voice. A friend’s name in my email. A hug. Bloggers who dream about me.

Sleepin’ with Keith

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This is why I love Keith Richards (other than his obvious good taste in jewelry). On being woken up after brain surgery:      “I was pissed off when they woke me up because I was in such a good sleep.” Keith. Dude. I understand. Some days, a coma sounds fuckin’ grand.

This is why I love Keith Richards (other than his obvious good taste in jewelry).

On being woken up after brain surgery:

     “I was pissed off when they woke me up because I was in such a good sleep.”

Keith. Dude. I understand. Some days, a coma sounds fuckin’ grand.

Pirates 2 – ‘slimy’

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Elizabeth Swann: There will come a moment when you have the chance to do the right thing. Jack Sparrow: I love those moments. I like to wave at them as they pass by. I asked a friend who’d seen a pre-release screening of Pirates of the Caribbean: Dead Man’s Chest how it was. “Slimy,” she […]

Elizabeth Swann: There will come a moment when you have the chance to do the right thing.
Jack Sparrow: I love those moments. I like to wave at them as they pass by.

I asked a friend who’d seen a pre-release screening of Pirates of the Caribbean: Dead Man’s Chest how it was.

“Slimy,” she said.

And so it is. Very very slimy.

I’m not gonna post a whole review right now – actually I might go see it again before I do that. But the short version.

Nowhere near as good as the first (as one would expect). But better than I’d expected.

It’s too long, for a film that’s really thin on plot. But it retains the charm of the original, has some amazing, stunning design, some excellent CGI and makeup effects, and it still has the cast of Depp, Bloom and Knightley, all of who are stunningly sexy. Knightley just gets hotter and hotter; she’s going to start burning movie screens if this continues.

This ain’t a movie that’s gonna win – or really deserve – oscars, other than for technical merit. But it’s highly entertaining, and will trand for several watchings, even if it doesn’t joint the first on the heavy-rotation shelf.

I’m ready to set sail – even more than usual.

the öutstretched grasping hand

elvis2 Comments

The Motörhead logo is back. I am the one, Orgasmatron, the outstretched grasping hand My image is of agony, my servants rape the land Obsequious and arrogant, clandestine and vain Two thousand years of misery, of torture in my name Hypocrisy made paramount, paranoia the law My name is called religion, sadistic, sacred whore. I […]

The Motörhead logo is back.

I am the one, Orgasmatron, the outstretched grasping hand
My image is of agony, my servants rape the land
Obsequious and arrogant, clandestine and vain
Two thousand years of misery, of torture in my name
Hypocrisy made paramount, paranoia the law
My name is called religion, sadistic, sacred whore.

I twist the truth, I rule the world, my crown is called deceit
I am the emperor of lies, you grovel at my feet
I rob you and I slaughter you, your downfall is my gain
And still you play the sycophant and revel in you pain
And all my promises are lies, all my love is hate
I am the politician, and I decide your fate

I march before a martyred world, an army for the fight
I speak of great heroic days, of victory and might
I hold a banner drenched in blood, I urge you to be brave
I lead you to your destiny, I lead you to your grave
Your bones will build my palaces, your eyes will stud my crown
For I am Mars, the god of war, and I will cut you down.

Because I löve you all. Vïcïôüslÿ.

Rock Star: Supernova

elvis6 Comments

I can’t help it. I’m already hooked. Rock Star: Supernova I watched the first one – and cared – because it was INXS and they had a back-story. A tragic, sordid death, a band trying to come back from oblivion. But I kept watching it because it was just good. Better than it got credit […]

I can’t help it. I’m already hooked.

Rock Star: Supernova

I watched the first one – and cared – because it was INXS and they had a back-story. A tragic, sordid death, a band trying to come back from oblivion.

But I kept watching it because it was just good. Better than it got credit for. It was well done, the house band was amazing, the performances, most of them, were good. Some of them were amazing. And the guy who won, JD Fortune, was exactly the right guy for the job.

But I figured, they can’t do it again. Not without INXS, who made it work. Not the band, but the people. They gave it soul.

But now, I’m watching the new one. With a pre-fab heavy metal supergroup called ‘Supernova’; Tommy Lee of The Crüe, Jason Newsted from Metalica, and Gilby Clarke from GnR.

And I’m thinking, wow, there went the soul.

And yet, I’m already hooked, after one episode. Even though only three or four of the performers were worth a damn; even though very little was really even memorable. I’m still hooked.

I can’t help it. And you know, I admit it, I’ve got a weak spot for Tommy Lee. maybe it’s just cause he looks like my buddy Lex, but something just makes me like the guy.

Anyone wanna make some bets on who’s makin’ it down to the final? Right now my picks are Dilana, Storm and the simply adorable Jill. And yeah, I’m bettin’ they go with a girl. But only if she’ll do triple penetration.

mod-rewrite grokage

elvis5 Comments

Anyone out there good with mod-rewrite? I’m trying to do something really simple but I’m not getting some key point. I just wanna do: https://www.moronosphere.com/whatsis redirect to https://www.moronosphere.com/bobsyeruncle I know that’s dead simple but for some reason I can’t get my head around it today.

Anyone out there good with mod-rewrite?

I’m trying to do something really simple but I’m not getting some key point.

I just wanna do:

https://www.moronosphere.com/whatsis
redirect to
https://www.moronosphere.com/bobsyeruncle

I know that’s dead simple but for some reason I can’t get my head around it today.