Ok, so I finished a new story. First thing that’s been done, really done, in like 18 months or more.

Only here’s the problem. I tried something I’ve never done before. A non-consent erotica story. Now, there’s certainly a fan base for this (Some of my favorite people are in that group), but it’s not at all for everyone. And when I say non-consent… Well, if you don’t know what that means, just don’t go read that story.

So be warned.

Now, as non-consent stories go, it’s fairly light weight. And it’s silly.

So I give you The Man with the Bag.

But don’t say I didn’t warn you.

When I started this thing, it was all about writing.

There’s been a lotta stuff since. Orkut, way too muchg about orkut, but it made things happen in my life. Geekery, and the blogosphere in general. Travel. Kids. Family. Friends. Sex.

My life, I guess.

But I finally, finally got something written. A story I started to conceptualize last fall, but didn’t have time to get done by the holidays. A bit of filth inspired by a song.

It’s not quite done. I think I need to expand it a bit (Usually it’s the other way, I need to strip out the too-much parts). But just finishing something, anything, even in a draft state, felt so damned good.

Fluff. Yeah. It’s fluff. But given that the last thing I finished was over 18 months ago, it still smells like napalm in the morning.

Yeah, I’ll post a link eventually. I need some expert editorial input on it to see if it’s worth a damn.

This is one of those bits of writing I have sitting around. I can’t figure out what the hell to do with it. I dunno where it goes, I didn’t start with a plot. I just started with an opening line and it went from there. Went this far and then… Nothing.

Here it is anyway.

It starts with:

“I picked her up at a funeral. Which should tell you something.”

Read more “It’s a start”

I had a long conversation over the last couple of days, about writing.

Julie over at Analyze Julie, she managed to give me one of thoise virtual shakings I need now and then.

What she said, in effect, was “quit thinking about it and start writing.”

Well, sure. I could do that.

Read more “stop thinking, start writing”

I keep having fragmentary ideas for things to write about and then I get a paragraph in and in and the idea fades out.

I could talk about Hurricane Karl, which is looking like it’s getting together in the Atlantic with Hurricane Jeanne and Hurricane Lisa, and evidently having itself some sort of a stratospheric three-way. (Yeah I know these are not all officially hurricanes, don’t finger-fuck me with details.)

I could talk about the ‘What is Kinky” conversation I had with my friend Julie the other day, but I can’t even remember the conversation now. I think there was mention on anal sex though, which is about all that stuck in my head.

I could talk about a couple of Hussies at TARCON 5 only they’re not there yet. But all I gotta say is, Amazing Race really doesn’t suck, and the emmys agree, it just beat Survivor for the second year. Really, kids, give it a try. I could talk about those same hussies. But… Well, let’s just say I Love Me some Hussies and leave it at that.

I have a whole piece about drugs and my youth half imagined and slightly written but I keep losing where I was going on that one. I. Um. Wonder why.

And I have a whole essay on true love that was inspired by a conversation on dotnode (which is like orkut but not as much), but I can’t seem to find the right words.

But I guess what it comes down to is, I can’t seem to maintain concentration long enough to actually get an entry done here. Same problem I’ve been having with the several stories I keep trying to get work done on. Where the hell’s my Ritalin?

I can’t figure out why I have so little will to write.

I’ve tried to work on some erotica I wanted to get down – a piece based on real people I know that I started a while back. But I stared at the page and nothing happened.

I tried to get back to the Wanton sequel I have partly done but it again defies me. I know it’s gone in the wrong direction, but I can’t figure out if I need to toss the whole thing or if I can find where it goes wrong.

I feel like, the effort I put into all this, re-building and upgrading, that I should now be typing out great reams of creative work; somehow though the sheer amount of brain-power I put into that technological project last week seemed to leave me spent. It’s frustrating. The muse, as usual, won’t be commanded but comes when she’s ready. A though that reminds me of a story, but it’s someone else’s story.

Today, I am off to work at a Highland Games, selling Utilikilts. Normally something I love doing, but for some reason today I’m not that into it. I’d rather be doing nothing, or writing, or doing stupid shit around the house, or drinking and hanging out with friends. I’m sure that will change when I’m there and doing the sales thing, but now — I’d rather be sleeping.

But maybe I’ll go buy a new kilt today. You can’t have too many kilts.

Baby when you gotta sleep
Lay your head down low
Don’t let the world
Lay heavy on your soul
’cause when you gotta sleep
You gotta sleep

Cool waves wash over me
Cool water running free
Lay your sweet hand on me
’cause I love you
Love you
Love you

–Spiritualized, ‘Cool Waves’

Someone told me today that my writing was very stream of conscious. Which puzzled me for a second because I don’t think of my writing that way. But it’s a quality I’ve always aspired to as a writer so I suppose that I took it as a compliment.

Read more “Stream of Unconsciousness”

Ever have nothing to say?

Funny, usually I don’t. I always have an opinion on everything, and want to tell you about it.

Some reason, I seem completely stuck now. And I’ve reached the point where I feel I should be blogging and that just makes it worse. I keep having these vague thoughts about some theme to blog on and it just — foop — goes away.

I’m at something of a loss.

There are these topics. Writing, the whys and why nots. Friends I want to talk about, and damn, I’ve made some really good friends on orkut, as I’ve mentioned before; people I’m keeping. There’s the book I’m reading now, which both makes me want to go into the theme of great writers losing it, but also carries a theme of important moments, points where things change.

I dunno. Can’t seen to lock down on one and get the thoughts rounded up and heading the same direction.

I also wanna talk about my friend Lex and the Survivor AllStars finale. And then there’s the story a friend of mine is writing which seems to feature my father as a character. But every time I crack that open and try to read it I run into my father’s name and can’t go on. Odd thing.

But let’s say this, on a completely unconnected topic.

Go Sharks.

I’m taking my ten year old to a sharks playoffs game tonight, and when I showed her the tickets, I think I got as many cool dad points as if I’d just told her she could have a helicopter. This kid almost exploded with glee. It was one of those moments that make it all worthwhile. She took off like a runaway train, screaming and hollering and dancing and tripping over herself in front of her school friends. And these kids – great kids and another entry to be done – all just accepted the goony behavior as if were the most natural thing in the world.

We went to one of the first games of the season – first hockey game ever for either of us – it it turned us both into huge fans, following the team all season. So this is a perfect culmination of that for us, to see a playoff game. It’s huge, and we’ve been trying to get these tickets for a while.

Go sharks. Win this one for a geeky ten year old girl who’s going to love watching this game even if you lose.

Read more “Bloggers block?”