forty-four one hundredths

I’ve tried several times  to do the hundred things about me meme but i never ever get it done.

But Hiromi went with 20 out of 100, Syl did 69 things (no wonder I like you, Syl), circe did 20-ish things. And those seem vaguely doable goals.

So I started going and was going to do thirteen, and then was going to do thirty-three, but somehow we wound up at forty-four, which is my age, and a really good calibre for a gun.

Thus, forty-four things about me.

1. I can drive really really well when i’m drunk.
2. I can’t resist cookies, or peanut-butter candy. No willpower at all.
3. I can’t sit still after i eat. i need to jump up and move around. Actually I just can’t sit still at all unless I have something to do with my hands. My laptop and wireless access is the only thing that gets me through meetings.
4. I collect rhinos.
5. I don’t like library books. I want to own a book – I want it there when I want it, and if I love it, I never want it to go away.
6. I don’t like talking on the phone.
7. I don’t think the rules apply to me. Ever.
8. I fall in love too easily.
9. I hate fruit and chocolate together. I find the idea nauseating.
10. I hate having my picture taken.
11. I hate making plans. I would rather wing everything.
12. I hate microwave ovens. I’d rather not have one in my kitchen.
13. I hate when people think they’re really good at something, when they actually suck at it. I take it as almost a personal affront.
14. I have a superstition about fortune cookies. If I read the fortune, I must take a bite of the cookie. I don’t even like fortune cookies, so I take a tiny bite and then abandon the rest.
15. I have trouble reading books that are the least bit badly written – yet I prefer erotica that’s very dirty and I don’t care if it’s badly written as long as it’s hot. I love non-consent, incest, any sort of weird taboo stuff. Basically anything out there beyond the range of things I’d do in real life is the stuff I find most erotic in writing.
16. I interrupt people. I try not to do it, but if you’ve ever talked to me, even once, I’ve interrupted you. I try every day to not do it, but can’t really say if I’m getting better or not.
17. I love hats, I own a couple dozens of them. Yet I always feel vaguely dorky when I wear them.
18. I love women who belch like men when they drink beer.
19. I never, ever fasten my seatbelt until the car is moving.
20. I play with knives.
21. I still read my email with a command-line, text only email reader (mutt). I’ve tried. Really. I can’t even think if I’m not composing with the vi editor.
22. I talk with my hands. I need to move and gesture to communicate. It actually used to make me uncomfortable on the phone until I got a head-set.
23. I think gray hair is sexy on women.
24. I think gun laws are unconstitutional, I think drug laws are insane, I think speed limits cause more accidents than they solve, and I think radar and speed traps are a violation of entrapment laws. My general opinion is that laws make life less good in almost all cases.
25. I think of myself as five inches taller than I actually am, and I think of my voice as being much deeper than in actually is.
26. I thought the apple iMac was a terrible idea. I thought the web browser was a stupid idea. I didn’t think people would really ever want to buy laptop computers. I thought yahoo and google were companies that could never make money.
27. I used to drive a forklift for a living, and i was great at it.
28. I will eat almost anything, no matter how weird.
29. I’ve got a waiting list for if I ever figure out how to clone myself. There’s some debate about who would get the original and who would take a clone.
30. I’ve hated milk since I was a kid. I’ve never understood how people can drink it
31. I’ve never done my own taxes. Not once.
32. I’ve wanted a harley since I was a kid, long before dentists and doctors decided they were cool. And now I can’t afford one because doctors and dentists think they’re cool and will pay 30k for one.
33. If it were just my choice, I’d pack up and leave for Hawaii today – sell everything, quit my job, go with nothing but my swimsuit and my dive gear. Walk off a plane and start a new life.
34. Loud noises make me jump. No matter how many times I go to concerts where there are exploding flash pots, no matter how many times I blow off m80s, how many guns I shoot, still, if it’s at all unexpected, I will always jump.
35. My all-time favorite car is the Jaguar E-type. Second would come some sort of seventies muscle car; chevy nova, GTO, the car on Supernatural, something like that.
36. My favorite bands are always changing but two that have never been off the top five: XTC and Genesis. Though both only up to a point (Genesis, up til Steve Hackett left; XTC up til Terry Chambers left).
37. My favorite books, as least right now – in no particular order: Mystic Pig, Lord of the Rings, Chump Change, Last Call, On Stranger Tides (which is back in print – yay!), Song for Arbonne (hell, all of Kay – all of it), Curse of Chalion, A Drink Before the War (the whole series, really), Under Cover of Daylight, Ask the Dust, Welcome to the Monkey House, Gate of Ivrel, Chanur. This list could change tomorrow but many of these books will stay and have been on this list for years.
38. My finger and toe nails grow incredibly fast. So does my hair.
39. My first tattoo was almost the Rush red star logo, and a close runner up was the Blue Oyster Cult logo. I got talked out of those, and I’m ok with that.
40. One of my favorite sports is figure skating
41. The cup I use is a huge factor in how much I enjoy a cup of coffee. I have three or four favorites, but which I go for first varies from day to day.
42. The only thing I miss about no longer having long hair is hair ties. I miss my ponytail when I see cool hair ties.
43. When I was a kid my favorite movies were 20000 Leagues under the Sea and the Incredible Mister Limpet. Maybe there’s a pattern there.
44. Whenever I hear the word clone I get the Doctor Evil Rap stuck in my head – From the moment I heard Frau say I had a clone /I knew that I’d be safe cuz I’d never be alone / an evil doctor shouldn’t speak a lot about his feelings /my hurt and my pain don’t make me too appealing.